That was the weirdest Christmas ever.

Destination: Zagreb Airport.

Our beat up car is rattling down the highway- a lone wolf winding through construction sites and thick patches of fog. We’re all Free Fallin’ with Tom Petty, and beef jerky and Twizzlers are keeping us awake. For once, the sky actually is the deep black velvet that the poets talk about, with millions of stars shining clearly in the cold. From my window, the sea is visible where it’s not blocked out by black hills rising up, huge and two-dimensional. For a few seconds at a time I see lights from distant villages, the same lights reflected by a handful of clouds that show up white and ghostly. There is no moon.

We attempt to sing along to ‘It’s the End of the World As We Know It’ before Simon and Garfunkel start in on Mrs. Robinson. Andy’s mom is sick. We don’t know much more than that, but we’re on a mission to get him home. I imagine all the Croatian families enjoying post-midnight-mass Christmas dinners in the middle of this odd, silent night. I wonder what it would be like to be Andy – worried, tired, desperate. I think about my dad and his wife, and my mom and sister and brothers, I know they’re all together at my grandparents’ house and I wish I could be there. But I’m glad I don’t have to fly home for an emergency. Kind of a Catch-22, really.

Now we’re definitely in the mountains. There is snow and the sky is all pink and glowy and the Smashing Pumpkins provide both the soundtrack and the motivation to forge ahead.

Christmas. It snuck up on me this year, and I don’t feel prepared emotionally, spiritually, mentally, or practically. I haven’t even wrapped presents yet. We missed going to mass on account of unexpected developments with Andy. I try to make it mean something to me. Jesus, God, came to us as a baby. He limited Himself to come to us, to die for us, so we could know Him. It isn’t sinking in. For Christ to leave heaven to come down to this earth – home of pain and suffering and betrayal and blood and tears and death – is (rightly) seen as a great sacrifice, an unthinkable humbling. But there is also Andy’s mother, and we’re terrified she might die, even though for her it would mean leaving all of that to go be in the presence of all Glory and Perfection and Beauty and Life.

Why do we think like that? Is it only selfishness that makes us want to keep those we love here with us? Is it only unbelief that makes us continue to fear death on some level even though we have an ultimate hope beyond death? Maybe. Maybe it’s selfishness and unbelief, but I also think that it’s partly an unknowing and partly a genuine love of the good that is here.

Because it is here that we learn about life and beauty and love and glory, and the only glimpses of ultimate goodness and perfection we’ve seen have been seen here, amidst the pain and wrong and darkness. Yes, we want to be with Christ and see all that He has prepared and be all that He has created us to be. But, for now, this world is where we have learned to love Him and to love others. Sometimes I am eager to leave it all behind, to get the hell out, so to speak, but not tonight.

Adam Duritz whines his way through ‘A Long December’ and I remember Katie Walsh, who’s reached her final destination and almost certainly understands all of this better than I do.

We’re finally at the airport and it only takes us a few tries to get to the area where you drop off departing passengers. The place is deserted, except for a single guard (or taxi driver?) standing in the cold across the street. We take turns going to the restroom and notice 3 or 4 travelers sleeping on benches. Andy will have to wait a few hours for the ticket counter to open so before leaving him we go through a few last cultural rituals for old times’ sake. We hug and say our goodbyes and get in the car to head home. In search of coffee, or anything, really, we make a few gas station stops and hit the highway armed with Snickers ice cream bars and cappuccinos that taste like watered-down potting soil.

The visibility is terrible, which helps keep us alert. Sunny keeps the conversation going with questions like, “How many kids do you guys want to have?” and we answer sincerely, and at length, because it’s 5:30 in the morning and we’ve got nothing better to do. John keeps the music going, and I try to navigate through the fog.

We roll into town at the first light of dawn, walk back to our apartments, and greet Christmas morning by crawling into bed.

John and Andy: The Unauthorized Edition

Subzero Twilight








Zamboni-riffic









Christmas Morning Magic

Ice Skating

Getting ready...











Group shot.














Čočo and a crazy drunken speed skater behind him.

I almost wish this had happened to me…

…because then I could write about it. Sunny tells her tale here.

Tonight it’s my turn to go to Robin and Carol’s with John and Taylor. I’m crossing my fingers for an adventure.

Did you think I was kidnapped?

Yeah, so I’ve been gone for a while. I blame it on Christmas festivities, urgent team matters, holiday busyness, and losing our internet for a week or so. I figured it wouldn’t be that big of a deal, since back home most of the West Coast was without power for days on end and most of you were probably busy celebrating Christmas with your families, anyway.

A little while back, I discovered that my new blog layout looked like crap on non-Macintosh computers, sorry about that! So after messing around on Blogger, I’ve reached a compromise where it looks merely mediocre on both Macs and PCs.

At any rate, all this is just to say that I’m back. I’d like to say, ‘Back with a vengeance!!’ but that would be an exaggeration.

Important People Agree: 'House' is a great show!

The last few days have been a whirlwind. We distributed 1600 newsletters in 2 days, had our Christmas party (somewhere around 50 or 60 people came, not sure exactly), cleaned up after the party, hung out and went to coffee with friends, started Christmas shopping, and as a really cool bonus, Kristi and Carolyn came to visit!

I had only spent about 45” with Kristi before in my life, but after spending some more concentrated time with her, all of the rumors of her complete awesomeness have been confirmed. And, of course, time with Carolyn was fantastic as usual. On Thursday I came home looking a little cracked-out and dazed, I guess, and the only thing I could do was try to explain, “Well, Carolyn just unloaded most, if not all, of the truths of the universe on me again, and I haven’t had a chance to process yet.”

As if just coming to visit wasn’t enough, they brought loads of gifts and books and treats, and they cooked some amazing dinners! Personally, I was very very excited to receive Sufjan Stevens’ Songs for Christmas. I know Christmas isn’t about the presents… but this one was pretty cool.

They left this morning, and we were sad they couldn’t stay longer, but it was fun to have them here while it lasted.

The Jaw Braw

My dear sister had jaw surgery last week to fix a problem that caused her jaw to keep locking open. This is the device that holds ice packs to her face. I think she pulls the look off pretty well.

What is a dekagram?

Today was officially set aside for a marathon-like cookie making extravaganza in preparation for the Christmas party tomorrow. We let all our friends know that our apartment would be open all day for drop-in baking, decorating, and socializing...







I call this one 'Homeless Santa.'












Homeless Santa and Found Object Holiday Tree join forces.












"How much is a dekagram?...Why don't you have a scale?"









Natasha, Taylor, and Doda are definitely busting some kind of crazy holiday moves. This came after a conversation that went something like this:
Bing Crosby Christmas album playing in background-
"Can we listen to some Christmas music?!"
"This is Christmas music."
"No, this is I want to die music."
Bing Crosby Christmas album no longer playing in background.








Later in the evening, John, Taylor, Allison, and Andy took some awkward prom-like pictures before heading out to the symphony, while Sunny and I stayed home and rocked the rest of the baking.






Whew. And somewhere in there I went to MUP and got a visa in my passport. Yay! It is valid for another 4 months.

Funny Girl

On Saturday we had our first community service outreach. Andy spent quite a lot of time contacting dozens of people trying to determine needs in the city and any way we could get involved and serve. By last Saturday morning, things had just barely fallen into place and we had a car full of clothes and food, a large bag of pre-made sandwiches, and 3 different locations we could split up and go to. We also had about 2 inches of rain during the hour immediately preceding the time we were supposed to start. We'd had a lot of students express interest in participating, but the night before about half had cancelled. And now we had wetness to deal with, too. We have found that Rijekans don't really enjoy going out in the rain- especially on a sleepy Saturday morning. But, lo and behold, 12-15 of our faithful friends showed up- cheerful, dripping, and eager to help.

Sunny and I were assigned to go to this organization that helps blind children learn valuable skills and equips them to function independently in school, jobs, etc. The founder, Mary, talked to us for a while and explained their history and strategy. After about 20 minutes, she informed us that she was blind herself. We were all surprised, nobody had noticed anything too unusual. Later we introduced ourselves. Sunny started, "I'm Sunny, and I'm from America..." and Mary said, "Oh! Funny! Hi Funny!" Someone corrected her, "No, Sunny, like sunčica." She laughed, "I know, I heard. Funny!"

Overall it was an awesome day, and now Sunny's new nickname is Funny. And Andy's new nickname is Bubbles. But that's a story for another day.